This is a day when you first meet me. Welcome to this place, that only things you will see. You’ll find a thing that will make you want to be me. Click and read, don’t forget to leave a comment here. I’ll make you sure to not regret it. Last but not the least, thank you for coming here. Bye, bye, and let’s meet again! ^.^
Lately I’ve been hard to reach
I’ve been too long on my own
Everyone has a private world
Where they can be alone
Are you calling me, are you trying to get through
Are you reaching out for me, and I’m reaching out for you I’m just so fuckin’ depressed
I just can seem to get out this slump
If I could just get over this hump
But I need something to pull me out this dump
I took my bruises, took my lumps
Fell down and I got right back up
But I need that spark to get psyched back up
In order for me to pick that mic back up
I don’t know how I pry away
And I ended up in this position I’m in
I starting to feel distant again
So I decided just to pick this pen
Up and tried to make an attempt to vent
But I just can’t admit
Or come to grips, with the fact that
I may be done with rap
I need a new outlet
I know some shits so hard to swallow
And I just can’t sit back and wallow
In my own sorrow
But I know one fact
I’ll be one tough act to follow
One tough act to follow
Copy
One tough act to follow
Here today, gone tomorrow
But you have to walk a thousand miles Chorus
Walk my shoes, just to see
What it’s like, to be me
All be you, let’s trade shoes
Just to see what I’d be like to
Feel your pain, you feel mine
Go inside each other’s mind
Just to see what we find
Look at shit through each other’s eyes But don’t let ‘em say you ain’t beautiful OoOo
They can all get fucked. Just stay true to you sOoOoo
Don’t let ‘em say you ain’t beautiful OoOo
They can all get fucked. Just stay true to you I think I’m starting to lose my sense of humor
Everything is so tense and gloom
I almost feel like I gotta check the temperature in the room
Just as soon as I walk in
It’s like all eyes on me
So I try to avoid any eye contact
Cause if I do that then it opens a door to conversation
Like I want that…
I’m not looking for extra attention
I just want to be just like you
Blend in with the rest of the room
Maybe just point me to the closest restroom
I don’t need fucking man servin’
Tryin to follow me around, and wipe my ass
Laugh at every single joke I crack
And half of them ain’t even funny like that
Ahh Marshall, you’re so funny man, you should be a comedian, god damn
Unfortunately I am, but I just hide behind the tears of a clown
So why don’t you all sit down
Listen to the tale I’m about to tell
Hell, we don’t have to trade our shoes
And you don’t have to walk no thousand miles Chorus
Walk my shoes, just to see
What it’s like, to be me
All be you, let’s trade shoes
Just to see what I’d be like to
Feel your pain, you feel mine
Go inside each other’s mind
Just to see what we find
Look at shit through each other’s eyes But don’t let ‘em say you ain’t beautiful OoOo
They can all get fucked. Just stay true to you sOoOoo
Don’t let ‘em say you ain’t beautiful OoOo
They can all get fucked. Just stay true to you sOoOoo Nobody asked for life to deal us
With these bullshit hands with doubt
We have to take these cards ourselves
And flip them, don’t expect no help
Now I could have either just
Sat on my ass and pissed and moaned
But take this situation in which I’m placed in
And get up and get my own
I was never the type of kid
To wait but I know to unpack his bags
Never sat on the porch and hoped and prayed
For a dad to show up who never did
I just wanted to fit in
Every single place
Every school I went
I dreamed of being that cool kid
Even if it meant acting stupid
Aunt Edna always told me
Keep making that face till it gets stuck like that
Meanwhile I’m just standing there
Holding my tongue up trying to talk like this
Till I stuck my tungue on the frozen stop sign poll at 8 years old
I learned my lesson and cause I wasn’t tryin to impress my friends no more
But I already told you my whole life story
Not just based on my description
Cause where you see it from where you’re sitting
Is probably 110% different
I guess we would have to walk a mile
In each other’s shoes, at least
What size you where?
I wear tens
Let’s see if you can fit your feet Chorus
Walk my shoes, just to see
What it’s like, to be me
All be you, let’s trade shoes
Just to see what I’d be like to
Feel your pain, you feel mine
Go inside each other’s mind
Just to see what we find
Look at shit through each other’s eyes But don’t let ‘em say you ain’t beautiful OoOo
They can all get fucked. Just stay true to you sOoOoo
Don’t let ‘em say you ain’t beautiful OoOo
They can all get fucked. Just stay true to you sOoOoo Lately I’ve been hard to reach
I’ve been too long on my own
Everyone has a private world
Where they can be alone… sOoOoo
Are you calling me, are you trying to get through OoOo
Are you reaching out for me, and I’m reaching out for you sOoOoo Oo Oo Yea… To my babies. Stay strong. Daddy will be soon
And to the rest of the world, god gave you the shoes
That fit you, so put em on and wear em
And be yourself man, be proud of who you are
Even if it sounds corny,
Don’t ever let no one tell you, you ain’t beautiful
Chorus: Dido
My tea's gone cold I'm wondering why I..
got out of bed at all
The morning rain clouds up my window..
and I can't see at all
And even if I could it'd all be gray,
but your picture on my wall
It reminds me, that it's not so bad,
it's not so bad..
1st Chorus: volume gradually grows over raindrop background
2nd Chorus: full volume with beat right after "thunder" noise
[Eminem as 'Stan']
Dear Slim, I wrote but you still ain't callin
I left my cell, my pager, and my home phone at the bottom
I sent two letters back in autumn, you must not-a got him
There probably was a problem at the post office or something
Sometimes I scribble addresses too sloppy when I jot him
but anyways; fuck it, what's been up? Man how's your daughter?
My girlfriend's pregnant too, I'm bout to be a father
If I have a daughter, guess what I'ma call her?
I'ma name her Bonnie
I read about your Uncle Ronnie too I'm sorry
I had a friend kill himself over some bitch who didn't want him
I know you probably hear this everyday, but I'm your biggest fan
I even got the underground shit that you did with Skam
I got a room full of your posters and your pictures man
I like the shit you did with Ruckus too, that shit was phat
Anyways, I hope you get this man, hit me back,
just to chat, truly yours, your biggest fan
This is Stan
{Chorus: Dido
[Eminem as 'Stan']
Dear Slim, you still ain't called or wrote, I hope you have a chance
I ain't mad - I just think it's FUCKED UP you don't answer fans
If you didn't wanna talk to me outside your concert
you didn't have to, but you coulda signed an autograph for Matthew
That's my little brother man, he's only six years old
We waited in the blistering cold for you,
four hours and you just said, "No."
That's pretty shitty man - you're like his fucking idol
He wants to be just like you man, he likes you more than I do
I ain't that mad though, I just don't like being lied to
Remember when we met in Denver - you said if I'd write you
you would write back - see I'm just like you in a way
I never knew my father neither;
he used to always cheat on my mom and beat her
I can relate to what you're saying in your songs
so when I have a shitty day, I drift away and put 'em on
cause I don't really got shit else so that shit helps when I'm depressed
I even got a tattoo of your name across the chest
Sometimes I even cut myself to see how much it bleeds
It's like adrenaline, the pain is such a sudden rush for me
See everything you say is real, and I respect you cause you tell it
My girlfriend's jealous cause I talk about you 24/7
But she don't know you like I know you Slim, no one does
She don't know what it was like for people like us growin up
You gotta call me man, I'll be the biggest fan you'll ever lose
Sincerely yours, Stan -- P.S.
We should be together too
{Chorus: Dido
[Eminem as 'Stan']
Dear Mister-I'm-Too-Good-To-Call-Or-Write-My-Fans,
this'll be the last package I ever send your ass
It's been six months and still no word - I don't deserve it?
I know you got my last two letters;
I wrote the addresses on 'em perfect
So this is my cassette I'm sending you, I hope you hear it
I'm in the car right now, I'm doing 90 on the freeway
Hey Slim, I drank a fifth of vodka, you dare me to drive?
You know the song by Phil Collins, "In the Air of the Night"
about that guy who coulda saved that other guy from drowning
but didn't, then Phil saw it all, then at a show he found him?
That's kinda how this is, you coulda rescued me from drowning
Now it's too late - I'm on a 1000 downers now, I'm drowsy
and all I wanted was a lousy letter or a call
I hope you know I ripped ALL of your pictures off the wall
I love you Slim, we coulda been together, think about it
You ruined it now, I hope you can't sleep and you dream about it
And when you dream I hope you can't sleep and you SCREAM about it
I hope your conscience EATS AT YOU and you can't BREATHE without me
See Slim; {*screaming*
Shut up bitch! I'm trying to talk!
Hey Slim, that's my girlfriend screamin in the trunk
but I didn't slit her throat, I just tied her up, see I ain't like you
cause if she suffocates she'll suffer more, and then she'll die too
Well, gotta go, I'm almost at the bridge now
Oh shit, I forgot, how am I supposed to send this shit out?
{Chorus: Dido
[Eminem]
Dear Stan, I meant to write you sooner but I just been busy
You said your girlfriend's pregnant now, how far along is she?
Look, I'm really flattered you would call your daughter that
and here's an autograph for your brother,
I wrote it on the Starter cap
I'm sorry I didn't see you at the show, I musta missed you
Don't think I did that shit intentionally just to diss you
But what's this shit you said about you like to cut your wrists too?
I say that shit just clowning dog,
c'mon - how fucked up is you?
You got some issues Stan, I think you need some counseling
to help your ass from bouncing off the walls when you get down some
And what's this shit about us meant to be together?
That type of shit'll make me not want us to meet each other
I really think you and your girlfriend need each other
or maybe you just need to treat her better
I hope you get to read this letter, I just hope it reaches you in time
before you hurt yourself, I think that you'll be doin just fine
if you relax a little, I'm glad I inspire you but Stan
why are you so mad? Try to understand, that I do want you as a fan
I just don't want you to do some crazy shit
I seen this one shit on the news a couple weeks ago that made me sick
Some dude was drunk and drove his car over a bridge
and had his girlfriend in the trunk, and she was pregnant with his kid
and in the car they found a tape, but they didn't say who it was to
Come to think about, his name was.. it was you
Damn!
[Chorus] I'm about to lose my mind You've been gone for so long I'm running out of time I need a doctor Call me a doctor I need a doctor, doctor To bring me back to life
[Eminem] I told the world, one day I would pay it back. Say it on tape and lay it, record it, so that one day I could play it back. But I don't even know if I believe it when I'm saying that. Doubt startin' to creep in, everyday it's just so grey and black. Hope, I just need a ray of that 'Cause no one sees my vision When I play it for 'em, they just say it's whack. But they don't know what dope is. And I don't know if I was awake or asleep when I wrote this. All I know is you came to me when I was at my lowest. You picked me up, breathed new life in me. I owe my life to you. But for the life of me, I don't see why you don't see like I do. But it just dawned on me; you lost a son. Demon's fightin' you, it's dark. Let me turn on the lights and brighten me and enlighten you. I don't think you realize what you mean to me, not the slightest clue. 'Cause me and you, were like a crew. I was like your sidekick. You gon' either wanna fight when I get off this f-cking mic, Or you gon' hug me. But I'm out of options, there's nothing else I can do cause...
[Chorus] I'm about to lose my mind You've been gone for so long I'm running out of time I need a doctor Call me a doctor I need a doctor, doctor To bring me back to life
[Eminem] It hurts when I see you struggle. You come to me with ideas. You say they're just pieces, so I'm puzzled. 'Cause the sh-t I hear is crazy, But you're either getting lazy, or you don't believe in you no more. Seems like your own opinions, not one you can form. Can't make a decision, you keep questioning yourself, Second guessing, and it's almost like your begging for my help. Like, I'm YOUR leader. You're supposed to f-cking be MY mentor. I can endure no more! I demand you remember who you are! It was YOU, who believed in me, When everyone was telling you, don't sign me. Everyone at the f-cking label, lets tell the truth.
You risked your career for me, I know it as well as you. Nobody wanted to f-ck with the white boy... Dre, I'm crying in this booth. You saved my life, now maybe it's my time to save yours. But I can never repay you, what you did for me is way more. But I ain't giving up faith, and you ain't giving up on me. Get up Dre! I'm dying, I need you, come back for f-ck's sake cause
[Chorus] I'm about to lose my mind You've been gone for so long I'm running out of time I need a doctor Call me a doctor I need a doctor, doctor To bring me back to life Bring me back to life
[Dr Dre] It literally feels like a lifetime ago But I still remember the sh-t like it was just yesterday though You walked in, yellow jump suit Whole room, cracked jokes Once you got inside the booth, told you, like smoke Went through friends, some of them I put on But they just left, they said they was riding to the death But where the f-ck are they now Now that I need them, I don't see none of them All I see is Slim F-ck all you fairweather friends All I need is him F-cking backstabbers When the chips were down, you just laughed at us Now you bout to feel the f-cking wrath of aftermath, faggots You gon' see us in our lab jackets and ask where the f-ck we been? You can kiss my indecisive ass crack maggots and the crackers ass Little cracker jack beat making wack math, Backwards producers, I'm back bastards One more CD and then I'm packing up my bags and as I leave And I guarantee they'll scream, Dre don't leave us like that man cause...
[Chorus] Im about to lose my mind You've been gone for so long I'm running out of time I need a doctor Call me a doctor I need a doctor, doctor To bring me back to life Bring me back to life Bring me back to life
Marshall Bruce Mathers III lahir pada Oktober, 17 1972 Kansas City, Missouri, Amerika Serikat. Anak seorang ibu lima belas tahun pada saat kelahirannya dan seorang ayah yang meninggalkan enam bulan kemudian tidak pernah kembali, Marshall menghabiskan masa kecilnya yang mendorong bolak-balik dari Kansas City dan Detroit. Ia menetap di Eastside Detroit ketika ia berusia 12. Switching sekolah setiap dua sampai tiga bulan membuatnya sulit untuk membuat teman, lulusan dan tetap keluar dari kesulitan. Menjadi penggemar rap untuk sebagian besar hidupnya, Marshall mulai mengetuk pada usia dini 4. Kata-kata bersajak bersama-sama, berjuang sekolahku di ruang makan siang membawa sukacita bagi apa yang dinyatakan keberadaan menyakitkan. Pada usia 14, ia mulai menjadi sangat serius rap, tapi tidak sampai ia berusia 17 tahun bahwa ia benar-benar membuat nama untuk dirinya sendiri, menjadi M & M, yang kemudian dia akan respell sebagai "Eminem". Ditolak oleh sesama rapper paling karena ras, Marshall tumbuh kemarahan yang mengalir melalui musik untuk hari ini. Setelah gagal kelas 9 selama tiga kali berturut-turut, ia berhenti sekolah, tapi menyatakan bahwa dia tidak menganggap dirinya bodoh dan tidak menyarankan bahwa orang harus mengikuti teladannya. Dia mengatakan bahwa hal itu tidak untuk dia. Memaksa dirinya pada acara radio, pertempuran gaya bebas, Marshall melemparkan diri kepala pertama ke dalam permainan rap, di mana ia ditelan sebagian besar waktu.
Album pertama berjudul "Tak Terbatas" dan, sementara album ini terjual kurang dari seribu eksemplar, itu adalah tahap bersiap-siap untuk rapper yang menjadi seorang jutawan. Saat itulah putrinya, Hailie Jade Scott, lahir pada tanggal 25 Desember 1995 dengan waktu pacar lama Kim Scott. Setelah ada ruginya sama sekali, bangkrut dan tidak tahu di mana ia akan tinggal minggu depan, Marshall berangkat untuk mengoceh tentang kehidupan secara umum, mengatur cepat menangkap telinga hip-hop sulit-untuk-menyenangkan bawah tanah. Apa yang keluar dari ini adalah Slim Shady EP, kerja awal untuk Dr Dre kemudian direvisi Slim Shady LP.
Pernah ku simpan jauh rasa ini
Berdua jalani cerita
Kau ciptakan mimpiku
Jujur ku hanya sesalkan diriku .net
Kau tinggalkan mimpiku
Dan itu hanya sesalkan diriku
Ku harus lepaskanmu
Melupakan senyummu
Semua tentangmu, tentangku, hanya harap
Jauh, ku jauh, mimpiku dng inginku
Ku harus lepaskanmu
Melupakan senyummu
Semua tentangmu, tentangku, hanya harap
Semua tentangmu, tentangku, hanya harap
Jauh, ku jauh, mimpiku dng inginku
Semua tentangmu, tentangku, hanya harap
Jauh, ku jauh, mimpiku dng inginku
[Verse 1:] Walking around looking for a way
But no one tells me which way to go
I'm caught up in a world
Elaborath a maze
Where yes men could easily be known
I ask them no questions
They give me no answers
Following the wise
But they're walking in pampers
Give me a cigarette
Smoking my cancer
Drink the pain away
But I still have no answers
[Hook:]
I'm lost on a road
Don't know which way to go
I'm losing my mind
Losing control of the wheel
And I'm swerving
On and off the road
I'm lost on a road
But survival is a must
Don't know who I can trust
I'm livin in a rush
I don't understand the fuss
My brain is bout to bust
[Chorus:]
I think I'm losin it
I might be losin it
I just might lose
Am I losin my mind?
And I'm so confused I don't know what to do
And I need a clue before I run out of time
Am I losin it?
Am I losin it?
I think I'm losin
I'm losin my mind
Am I losin it?
Am I losin it?
I think I'm losin
I'm losin my mind
[Verse 2: Lil Wayne]
I'm a need counseling
I lost my mind and still haven't found it
I used to be so well-rounded
But now I tiptoe on hell's boundaries
F. Baby A.K.A. crazy
Trapped in a maze, therefore I am amazing
Block E the doc, I'm just a patient
And even with Navigation
I'm lost on a...
[Hook: Gorilla Zoe and Lil Wayne]
I'm lost on a road
I... I... I don't know what's wrong with me
But... but I'm a keep that styrofoam with me
I'm lost on a road
And I don't know what's wrong with me
Gorilla Zoe on the song with me
He must be gone with me
[Chorus:]
I think I'm losin it
I might be losin it
I just might lose
Am I losin my mind?
And I'm so confused I don't know what to do
And I need a clue before I run out of time
Am I losin it?
Am I losin it?
I think I'm losin
I'm losin my mind
Am I losin it?
Am I losin it?
I think I'm losin
I'm losin my mind
[Verse 3:]
I'm makin this money
Just to go spend it
Livin the good life
Hope nobody ends it
But who are you kidding?
Ay who are you lying to?
You know if they want you
Best believe they will find you
[Hook:]
I'm lost on a road
And there's no one to talk to
There's nowhere to run to
I'm goin in circles
I'm talkin to myself
Got me blazin this purple
[Chorus:]
I think I'm losin it
I might be losin it
I just might lose
Am I losin my mind?
And I'm so confused I don't know what to do
And I need a clue before I run out of time
Am I losin it?
Am I losin it?
I think I'm losin
I'm losin my mind
Am I losin it?
Am I losin it?
I think I'm losin
I'm losin my mind
Easy come, easy go
That’s just how you live, oh
Take, take, take it all,
But you never give
Should of known you was trouble from the first kiss, Had your eyes wide open -
Why were they open?
Gave you all I had
And you tossed it in the trash
You tossed it in the trash, you did
To give me all your love is all I ever asked, Cause what you don’t understand is
I’d catch a grenade for ya (yeah, yeah, yeah)
Throw my hand on a blade for ya (yeah, yeah, yeah)
I’d jump in front of a train for ya (yeah, yeah , yeah)
You know I’d do anything for ya (yeah, yeah, yeah) Oh, oh
I would go through all this pain, Take a bullet straight through my brain,
Yes, I would die for ya baby ; But you won’t do the same
No, no, no, no
Black, black, black and blue beat me till I’m numb Tell the devil I said “hey” when you get back to where you’re from
Mad woman, bad woman,
That’s just what you are, yeah,
You’ll smile in my face then rip the breaks out my car
Gave you all I had
And you tossed it in the trash
You tossed it in the trash, yes you did
To give me all your love is all I ever asked Cause what you don’t understand is
I’d catch a grenade for ya (yeah, yeah, yeah)
Throw my hand on a blade for ya (yeah, yeah, yeah)
I’d jump in front of a train for ya (yeah, yeah , yeah)
You know I’d do anything for ya (yeah, yeah, yeah) Oh, oh
I would go through all this pain, Take a bullet straight through my brain,
Yes, I would die for ya baby ; But you won’t do the same
If my body was on fire, ooh You’ d watch me burn down in flames You said you loved me you’re a liar Cause you never, ever, ever did baby…
But darling I’ll still catch a grenade for ya
Throw my hand on a blade for ya (yeah, yeah, yeah)
I’d jump in front of a train for ya (yeah, yeah , yeah)
You know I’d do anything for ya (yeah, yeah, yeah) Oh, oh
I would go through all this pain, Take a bullet straight through my brain,
Yes, I would die for ya baby ; But you won’t do the same.
No, you won’t do the same,
You wouldn’t do the same,
Ooh, you’ll never do the same,
No, no, no, no
Lampu senter tidak terlalu membantu menerangi lorong gelap yang mereka lalui. Ditambah beban berat tangki oksigen serta panasnya baju terusan anti radiasi yang mereka kenakan, situasi sangatlah tidak nyaman.
Apalagi, baju anti radiasi itu pun cuma namanya saja. Pada kenyataannya, pakaian itu hanya melindungi mereka sedikit saja dari bahaya radiasi.
Tapi tak sedikitpun keluhan keluar dari mulut mereka. Padahal, mereka sedang bertaruh nyawa di tempat itu. Setiap detik, bisa saja ledakan dan radiasi merenggut nyawa mereka. Jika pun tak meninggal seketika, berbagai penyakit mengerikan telah mengintai mereka dalam 20-30 tahun ke depan; atau bahkan lebih cepat dari itu.
"Kami sedang melakukan misi bunuh diri. Kami menerima nasib ini seperti menerima vonis mati,” begitu isi pesan singkat seorang pekerja kepada keluarganya.
Adalah 200 pekerja di Pembangkit Listrik Tenaga Nuklir (PLTN) Fukushima Dai-ichi, yang secara sukarela memilih tinggal di tempat berbahaya itu. Mereka mencoba mendinginkan reaktor nuklir yang sedang memuntahkan radiasi dalam batas yang tak terbayangkan, serta memantaunya detik demi detik.
Mereka membagi diri dalam empat shift, tiap kelompok 50 orang. Mereka kerap disebut The Fukushima Fifty, 50 orang luar biasa yang siap mati.
Perusahaan tempat mereka bekerja, Tokyo Power Plant Co (Tepco) menurut New York Times, menolak mengungkapkan identitas para pekerja yang bertahan di situ. Tepco hanya mengatakan mereka ditugasi untuk memompa air laut dan menjaga reaktor tetap dingin. Sekaligus, untuk memantau tingkat radiasi dengan menggunakan pengukur kecil yang mereka bawa, karena pengukur radiasi di instalasi PLTN tersebut telah rusak.
Lebih penting lagi, mereka juga ditugasi untuk mencari cara agar perangkat inti PLTN tidak ikut hancur akibat ledakan berkali-kali beberapa hari lalu. Sebab, jika itu terjadi, akibatnya sungguh fatal. Zat radioaktif bisa menyebar dalam skala besar.
"Melawan rasa lelah dan perut kosong, kami memaksa diri untuk terus bekerja,” tulis salah seorang pekerja, Michiko Otsuki, di Internet.
New York Times menulis, 200 pekerja yang tinggal ini bukanlah para pemuda gagah berani yang memiliki keahlian dan pengetahuan tinggi mengenai nuklir. Bukan pula manajer yang memang bertanggung jawab atas jalannya reaktor. Mereka adalah para lelaki tua, pekerja dan pemadam kebakaran yang sedikit lagi--tidak sampai setengah tahun--akan memasuki masa pensiun.
Jadi, jikapun mereka terpapar radiasi, mereka berharap tak akan sempat merasakan penyakit yang akan menggerogoti tubuh mereka 20-30 tahun dari sekarang. Mereka berharap sudah akan dipanggil Sang Khalik karena usia tua, bukan lantaran leukemia, katarak, maupun kanker.
Di dalam pembangkit nuklir tersebut, tingkat radiasi mencapai 1.000 milliseverts (mSv) dalam satu jam. Tak jelas berapa banyak radiasi yang telah diserap oleh para pekerja itu. Yang jelas, Jepang dan Amerika Serikat telah menetapkan batas aman radiasi yang dapat diterima seseorang hanyalah 50 mSv dalam satu tahun. Untuk situasi darurat seperti ini, Kementerian Kesehatan Jepang membolehkan radiasi hingga 250 mSv, itu pun sudah maksimal.
Dan para pekerja itu mulai berguguran, satu persatu. Dari yang memilih bertahan di dalam pembangkit, lima di antaranya dilaporkan telah meninggal dunia, dua hilang, dan 21 lainnya terluka.
Jutaan nyawa lain
Yang sedang diperjuangkan para pekerja itu, dengan nyawa mereka, adalah enam reaktor nuklir. Tiga telah meledak dalam proses pendinginan. Secara bergantian, mereka memantau dan memompa air laut untuk mendinginkan reaktor untuk mencegah petaka nuklir dan merenggut lebih banyak lagi nyawa manusia.
Setelah gempa 9 Skala Richter dan tsunami dahsyat menerjang pesisir timur Jepang pada Jumat, 11 Maret 2011, nyawa yang melayang sudah tak terkira. Menurut laporan dari Badan Polisi Nasional Jepang per tanggal 16 Maret 2011, korban tewas mencapai angka 3.676 orang, 1.990 terluka, dan 7.558 orang masih dilaporkan hilang di 16 prefektur yang disapu tsunami. Diperkirakan, angka tewas di lapangan jauh lebih besar lagi, dan dikhawatirkan bisa mencapai puluhan ribu orang.
Dan nyawa yang hilang niscaya akan berlipat-lipat jika pembangkit nuklir itu gagal didinginkan, meledak, lalu menebar zat radioaktif yang mematikan keluar.
Adalah getaran gempa yang merusak infrastruktur PLTN yang terdiri dari beberapa bangunan dan enam reaktor. Salah satunya teramat vital: generator diesel raksasa untuk menjaga pendinginan reaktor.
Menurut laman JMA, sistem peringatan dini tsunami terhubung dengan beberapa fasilitas vital di Jepang. Begitu peringatan menyala, sistem akan otomatis menghentikan kereta api, mengendalikan lift, dan mengatur laju lalu lintas. Nah, sistem itu juga lalu memadamkan secara otomatis listrik di reaktor nuklir. Celakanya, ketika itu terjadi, generator sebagai penyalur energi cadangan juga rusak sehingga aliran listrik putus sama sekali. Pendinginan gagal dan petaka pun mengintai.
Tiga unit reaktor nuklir yang masih aktif kini jadi pusat perhatian dunia. Reaktor-reaktor itu adalah tipe reaktor air panas yang membutuhkan temperatur tertentu untuk beroperasi dengan aman.
Seperti diberitakan CNN, batangan bahan bakar (fuel rods) normalnya bekerja di suhu 760 derajat Celcius. Jika suhu meningkat hingga lebih dari 1.200 derajat Celcius, fuel rods akan rusak. Semakin panas lagi, fuel rods akan meleleh. Lelehan inilah yang akan menyebarkan radiasi, bahkan dapat menguapkan inti reaktor. Bila ini sampai terjadi, bencana mengerikan akan terjadi.
Dalam waktu empat hari, tiga reaktor nuklir yang aktif meledak. Reaktor unit satu meledak pada 12 Maret 2011. Unit tiga meledak dua hari kemudian. Dan berselang sehari, giliran unit dua yang meledak.
Perdana Menteri Jepang Naoto Kan pun langsung mengumumkan situasi darurat-nuklir. Sebanyak 170 ribu warga di radius hingga 20 km diungsikan. Di luar itu, pemerintah menghimbau mereka untuk tetap di dalam rumah, menutup semua jalur udara, dan menutup mulut dengan handuk.
Belum jelas apa penyebab pasti ledakan itu. Namun, menurut Associated Press, ledakan terjadi ketika petugas PLTN berusaha mendinginkan reaktor nomor satu menggunakan air. Ternyata, air yang mereka gelontorkan menciptakan hidrogen ketika terpapar fuel rods. Besarnya tekanan memaksa petugas mengeluarkan hidrogen sebagian. Namun, saat dikeluarkan hidrogen itu malah bercampur dengan oksigen dan mengakibatkan ledakan.
Tingkat radiasi yang keluar dari reaktor yang rusak masih turun naik. Menurut MSNBC, pada 15 Maret 2011 radiasi bisa mencapai 11.900 mSv/jam. Para ahli dari Indonesia yang dikumpulkan di KBRI Tokyo, bahkan mengatakan tingkat radiasi di daerah dekat reaktor mencapai hingga 400 ribu mSv/jam.
Petugas yang bekerja pun kucing-kucingan dengan radiasi. Jika memuncak, mereka menyingkir. Jika menurun, mereka maju, melakukan berbagai hal, sebisanya.
Radiasi bahkan dikabarkan terbawa angin dan telah mencapai Tokyo yang berjarak 250 km dari PLTN.
Kepala Badan Energi Atom Internasional PBB (IAEA), Yukiya Amano, pada Rabu, telah menyatakan situasi di Fukushima sangat serius. Amano mengatakan fuel rods di unit 4, 5 dan 6 telah terekspos udara dan menyebarkan radiasi. Berbagai negara mulai menyerukan warga negaranya untuk menjauhi PLTN Fukushima, setidaknya hingga radius 80 km.
Berbahaya, memang.
Namun, nuklir selama ini menjadi andalan Jepang dalam memenuhi kebutuhan listrik mereka sehari-hari. Data dari Federasi Perusahaan Pembangkit Listrik (FEPC) Jepang, negeri ini mengoperasikan 55 reaktor nuklir yang dihasilkan listrik sebesar hampir 50 gigawatt. Energi ini menyumbang 34,5 persen kebutuhan listrik di Jepang.
Di Jepang energi nuklir telah menjadi prioritas strategis sejak 1973. Bagi mereka, energi nuklir merupakan pilihan bijak sebab Negeri Sakura tak memiliki banyak sumber minyak dan gas.
Fukushima bukan kecelakaan nuklir yang pertama di Jepang. Pada pertengahan 1990, sempat terjadi beberapa kecelakaan nuklir, di antaranya kecelakaan Tokaimura. Toh, pemerintah Jepang terus kukuh mengembangkan energi nuklir.
Chernobyl, Three Mile, Fukushima
Tragedi Fukushima langsung mengingatkan dunia pada dua tragedi nuklir lainnya.
Di tahun 1986, pembangkit listrik tenaga nuklir di Republik Sosial Soviet Ukraina (sekarang Ukraina) tiba-tiba mati daya. Akibat memanasnya sistem, beberapa ledakan terjadi. Petaka berpuncak ketika sebagian inti nuklir meleleh.
Radiasi di luar area ledakan mencapai 50 kali lebih besar dari radiasi di Fukushima. Radiasi tingkat tinggi ini menyebar ke seluruh bagian barat Uni Soviet, Eropa Timur, Eropa Barat, dan Eropa Utara. Sebagian besar warga di Ukraina, Belarus dan Rusia diungsikan, dan 336 ribu orang di antaranya memilih tidak kembali.
Akibat paparan radiasi, 31 pekerja PLTN dan pemadam kebakaran yang kala itu berada di lokasi meninggal dalam hitungan bulan. Sebanyak 4.000 anak-anak dan dewasa mengidap kanker tiroid setelah mengkonsumsi susu yang terkontaminasi radioaktif. Dilaporkan, lima juta orang terkena dampak radiasi dan menderita sejumlah penyakit, mulai dari cacat tubuh hingga kanker. Sampai saat ini, tingkat radiasi di Chernobyl masih dalam taraf kritis.
Berdasarkan perhitungan International Nuclear and Radiological Event Scale (INES), skala kecelakaan Chernobyl mencapai level 7, level tertinggi dalam sebuah kecelakaan nuklir.
Sebelumnya, pada tahun 1979, kecelakaan serupa terjadi di Pulau Three Mile, Pennsylvania, AS. Sebagian inti nuklir di PLTN ini juga meleleh. Beruntung, karena selubung reaktor tidak rusak, maka meski radiasi menyebar ke wilayah yang cukup luas, tapi tarafnya masih tergolong rendah. Peristiwa Three Mile dikategorikan kecelakaan nuklir level dua, yakni kecelakaan nuklir dengan cakupan wilayah yang luas.
Bagaimana dengan Fukushima?
Seperti diberitakan NHK, Jumat kemarin, Badan Keselamatan Industri Nuklir Jepang telah menaikkan skala radiasi ke level 5 dari level tertinggi 7 dalam Skala INES. Ini karena lebih dari 3 persen dari bahan bakar nuklir telah rusak dan bahan radioaktif telah bocor dari pembangkit.
Situasi artinya telah menjadi semakin gawat saat KBRI Tokyo pada Rabu sebelumnya mengumpulkan 10 ahli nuklir Indonesia yang rata-rata sedang mengambil gelar doktor di sejumlah universitas di Negeri Sakura.
Para ahli ini, seperti dimuat di laman KBRI, menyimpulkan bahwa kecelakaan di reaktor Fukushima Unit 1 sampai 4 masih di skala 4 INES. Artinya, lingkup kecelakaan masih di sekitar PLTN Fukushima. Namun, kecelakaan ini telah merusak gedung reaktor, kolam cadangan air pendingin, dan mengakibatkan kebakaran di gedung reaktor yang menyimpan bahan bakar bekas.
Jikapun terjadi pelelehan inti nuklir, diperkirakan radiasi yang dilepaskan tidak akan sebesar peristiwa Chernobyl. Dilansir laman The Guardian, setiap reaktor di Fukushima memiliki selubung baja setebal 20 cm. Selubung itu masih dibungkus lagi dengan bangunan beton. Jadi, jikapun meleleh, dampaknya diperkirakan tidak akan terlalu parah.
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Yang parah tak terkira tentu mereka yang berada di dalam selubung beton tebal itu, di mana para pekerja berani mati masih terus berkutat. Mereka mengusahakan segala cara, semampu mereka, untuk mendinginkan dan memantau reaktor di PLTN Fukushima.
“Saya mendengar kalau dia menawarkan dirinya untuk jadi sukarelawan, walaupun dia akan pensiun setengah tahun lagi. Mataku tak kuasa menahan tangis… Di rumah dia terlihat bukan tipe orang yang mampu melakukan tugas-tugas besar. Tapi hari ini saya sangat bangga padanya. Dan saya berdoa untuk keselamatannya,” tulis seseorang di Twitter dengan akun @NamicoAoto.
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